By Kevin Rutherford
Earlier this year, a 33-year-old man got plastic surgery, valued at $100,000, to make his face look like that of pop star Justin Bieber, a move that was deemed kind of creepy but altogether innocuous.
Then came his single.
Sheldon, along with two other Botoxed-up acquaintances, have formed the group the Plastics, with a new song, also called “The Plastics,” now on YouTube.
The tune begins with something out of an infomercial: “Are you one of the boring people who don’t want to be beautiful?” the Plastics ask. “Because everyone can be beautiful — when you’re made of plastic!”
Thus begins our descent into madness, during which Sheldon, along with Kitty Jay and Venus D’lite, sing about the joys of plastic surgery through — what else? — Auto-Tune, because why not up the artificial ante?[youtube https://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=55Csg0XCGIk]
Kitty Jay sings a bit about her idol, Jennifer Lawrence, having decided to take on her appearance due to her standing as a “perfect specimen,” while D’lite is all about aping Madonna. Of course, when one knows the look each is going for, everything makes a little more sense — but only slightly.
Watch on to see the Plastics try to mouth along the words in-sync without it looking too unnatural, their own doctors make quick appearances as they apparently try to do their job while clients shoot a music video in their office, and the entire song go completely off the rails multiple times due to the singers’ inability to keep in time — or is it rough transitions from the producer? What even is happening?
Honestly, though, best line: “Wherever she goes, she doesn’t need a cushion / She has silicone in there.” “More cushion for the pushin’!” “*half-hearted whooping*”
Since its release last weekend, “The Plastics” has garnered over 100,000 YouTube views. It’s also about 95 percent dislikes, in case you were trying to gauge how it was attracting viewers.